PRESSING IN TOWARDS GOD

 

May 13, 2022

What a whirlwind of the last few days. We have been cleaning out the rental house so we can move in. They started digging our basement yesterday which was so exciting. Lassen was loving watching all of the equipment. 

Kyle’s parents paid to put Brighton’s obituary in the local paper and I sent it to all of my friends. It was really special to see the responses of how much his life matters and how much of a change his story has and will continue to make. So proud of you baby Brighton!

I didn't know this about my Grandma's brother!

Hard things this week: Macy at the funeral home emailed me that Brighton’s cremation was complete and that I could order an urn. Thankfully, I had already picked one out on Etsy. It was really hard to have to ask what size I would need as I was completely clueless.

Lassen started saying “Brighton. Heaven. Jesus”

My niece Rhea, who is also 2, told me that Baby Brighton was in Heaven with Jesus. Sweet girl. You’re so right.

The moon is always round...God is always good!

May 14, 2022
So many people have texted me that they have given to Love, Lucas and it makes me so happy!

I can’t believe it has been 2 weeks since I had our sweet boy. I ran this morning for the first time because physically I have been feeling great. (I know this isn’t the best decision but mentally I need it.) I ran the length of the Isaiah Song (12 minutes) and focused on my sweet Brighton and the words and all of the amazing memories I have with my baby, also celebrating 2 weeks with Jesus. I hate that I don’t have my son, but I know he is in the best place I could ever want.

We packed all day and it was really hard to pack Brighton’s things up, even though I am happy I’ll have them all together and safe for when we move.

I love Lassen’s words. “Yeppppp.” He is loving “toast with butta and cin-min.” He’s also smiling really big and squinting his eyes.

May 17, 2022

Kyle is 37 today! Unfortunately, I didn’t plan anything (Kyle doesn’t care about birthdays but I do!) and we have been so busy getting our house ready to show on Thursday, plus dealing with the rental house and making lots of trips over there to take things along with errands for our new house. It is hard to imagine how different things would be if we had Brighton. I miss him so much. His original due date was tomorrow, May 18^th. I know he is in the most perfect place, but selfishly I still want him in my arms. Someday, I’ll have you again sweet boy.

Amazing women continue to bring us meals 3 times each week, many who I have never met and some who aren’t even in my MOPS group but just are friends with ladies in my group. It has been so great to meet them, share Brighton’s story, and sometimes hear theirs as well.

I told our neighbor Pat about Brighton last night. She is very introverted but we have had some really good conversations lately. I let her look through all of my pictures from Brighton’s birthday and when she read his obituary, she started to tear up. She told me she hadn’t cried in 13 years since her mom passed away.